Hello! Stupidity and Shenanigans Await

Drunken debauchery, double downs, football, making plays, awful coaching, 4:00 AM food runs, tailgating, unnecessary pit stops, embarrassing photos, block parties, dueling pianos, very white chicks from Idaho, 6-6 shenanigans, Gary Pinkel, Beavers, Boone’s, multiple shots of tequila, teams without a coach, uneventful halftime events, shady Japanese blackjack dealers, cheap buffets, New Year’s Eve and more bad decisions than anybody would care to count…

Quite the long list, right? Well, everything on the list above (and more) can be found at one place: BOWL TOUR 2007.

For some strange reason, a group of us has decided to take on an incredibly challenging and daunting task: to attend three bowl games in three different states in five days. Oh, and we decided to throw in a college basketball game (Stanford at Arizona; Tucson, Ariz.) for good measure, just to keep us on our toes.

Starting on December 28, 2006, our fearless group will tackle the Independence Bowl (Shreveport, La.), Sun Bowl (El Paso, Texas) and Fiesta Bowl (Tempe, Ariz.), all with the sort of reckless abandon you would expect from a group of single people with absolutely no responsibility whatsoever at this time of year.

I mean, it’s either keep our rear-ends glued to the television sets in Waco; or, hit the road to see how many different city ordinances we can break in one week’s span.

Obviously, the trip is not for the weary; therefore, it’s imperative the loyal readers of this historic account take a moment to meet everyone involved:

Me (Michael): I’m one of the two founding fathers of this trip. The idea came to me after the Kansas City Chiefs blew a game against the Cleveland Browns. Pissed off, I knew I would need something to do at the end of December since the Chiefs were going to miss the playoffs again.

Since I was 10 beers deep at the time of the loss, I figured some pointless road trip where I could act as immature as possible without any real repercussions whatsoever was the way to go. Toss in the fact I work in public relations and I had a week off from work at the end of the month; well, then I knew a pointless bowl road trip was a must. All I needed was to hook somebody else on the idea, which leads to…

Dan: The other founding father, Dan bought in immediately because he is an Oklahoma grad. Since the Sooners went from playing in some crap-tastic bowl to playing in a BCS bowl in the span of two weeks, Dan was so giddy about OU’s fortunes he bought into the idea of a ridiculous road trip immediately.

Of course, the fact he is currently stuck in the hell that is law school probably had something to do with his eagerness to go on the trip. If it weren’t for this road trip, Dan would probably go on a three-state killing spree sometime in February. I wouldn’t blame him. Law school is that bad.

Adrienne: Yes, there are girls on this road trip! Some might question this decision to have girls come along; but, I know it’s a wise one. Adrienne is a bartender who has recently graduated from college. If I had to rank the 10 drunkest days I have had in Texas, nine of them probably have involved Adrienne in some way, shape or form. Whether it’s because she bought me a round of shots, knocked a few beers off the tab or brought a few bottle of Boone’s to some random after-hours, Adrienne has definitely knocked my BAC level up a few notches on numerous occasions. Toss in the fact Adrienne loves football, is always willing to have fun and is about to have the giant misfortune of stepping into the “real world” like the rest of us; it’s obvious why she is a must on this historic journey.

Bobby: A journeyman who has made his way from Waco to Lubbock to somewhere in England to Lubbock and back to Waco, Bobby is another guy who is lucky enough to have some time off to do some incredibly stupid things over the course of this week. Bobby’s reason for going is he’s pretty much willing to do anything. This can be seen in the fact he openly roots for some random European soccer team. I mean, honestly, who in the States does that sort of thing?

His savvy on the soccer pitch and familiarity with the English hooligans will come in handy when I want to berate some Missouri fans to the point of starting a riot during the middle of Rhianna’s halftime performance at the Sun Bowl (more on my hatred for Missouri later).

Stephanie: If I had written this post 24 hours ago, I would be using this space to introduce ‘some random girl.’ I don’t think I have ever met Stephanie; but, apparently she is a friend of Bobby, an Oklahoma fan and more than willing to go. She’s also a teacher, which explains why she has some time at her disposal at the end of December. Unfortunately for her, if her students happen to run into this blog, she will probably get fired. Best of luck, Stephanie!

Last; but, not least:

Butler: When told of an extra ticket to the Fiesta Bowl, Butler immediately grabbed a phone and dialed the nearest Delta customer service center to plop 50,000 frequent flyer miles on a trip from Salt Lake City to Phoenix just to be part of the shenanigans. Needless to say, Butler is stoked. Part of the reason; of course, is because he lives in Salt Lake City. I’d describe Butler in more detail; but, one cannot really describe the indescribable. I guess the best way to put it is things will “get turned up a notch” once he joins the party in Tempe on Dec. 30. Yes, this could get ugly.

There it is, six fearless souls willing to take on three bowl games in five days. Thanks to the wonders of the internet, the tales of this momentous occasion will be documented. Over the coming days on this blog, readers can find various highlights (and lowlights) of the journey.

The trip starts at 5:00 p.m. on Wednesday, December 27, so make sure to check back often for video, photos and some random words about the trip at hand.

Oh, one final note: if you happen to be attending any of the above mentioned events and want to do a free shot of tequila or eat an undercooked hamburger, drop us a line at bowltour07@yahoo.com, we’d be happy to have you stop on by.

Adios, for now!
Michael